Listen up punks
And eliminate the crap
I’m a marketing major
And this is where it’s at
If you’re looking for a place
To invest your corporate dollar
Music is the industry
To which I’d point and holler
Connect your game
To a band’s success and fame
They’ve the goods the looks the sound
And then they’ve got the name
Cos band names are brand names
Hit singles are radio jingles
Listen to my pitch
To scratch the advertising itch

Limp Biscuit Think Arnotts
Weezer – Quit Australia
Powderfinger think Scotch Finger
Pink think Crayola
Bodyjar think Tupperware
Midnight Oil of Olay
Tool think Mitre 10
End of Fashion think Daryl Somers
(alternate: Sick Puppies – R.S.P.C.A.)
Lucksmiths think the Dick Smiths
The Libra Fleur 28 Days
(I don’t get it)
Aussie Home Loans think Ossie Osbourne
Burke’s Backyard think Bjork’s Backyard
Give me a home among the gum trees
With a dog or two and a kangaroo
Flowers out the back and the veggies out the front
In Bjork’s backyard.
(Sssh. I like swans)
Sesame Street was brought to you
By the letter U and the number 2
Yeah the Catholic Church endorses The Superjesus
The dyslexic society sponsors You Am I
(I don’t get it)
Nokia think Moby (NOTE: my mate in Canberra used to call his mobile his ‘moby’ so this lyric probably never make sense to anyone)
Ken Done think Badly Drawn Boy
Something for Kate Moss (alt: Kate Ritchie)
And I couldn’t think of one for Eminem

BONUS LINES:
Taco Bell and Sebastian
Ikea and Tina Turner
PJ Harvey World Travel
Heart Foundation – The Strokes.
(NOTE: A girl once came up after a show and said ‘a stroke occurs in the brain, not the heart)

 

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